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March 21, 2006

I was really depressed. Just got out of the library, went to Barnes & Nobles, and found Salgado’s “Sahel”. Sublime photographs. Looking at them elevated my mind from the earth to the skies. I agree with Schopenhauer, “art is the only refuge.”

Earlier I had an argument with Z. I don’t remember a single time which we’ve been together for more than an hour without ending up arguing. She compared me to “all the successful people in the family who have gone to good universities and have made something out of their lives.” I wonder why she didn’t mention that their dadies paid their whole tuition, bought them houses, and gave them cars. I didn’t say any of these things. What can you say to an old woman who has to carry the heavy weight of a miserable past on her shoulders?

It's been three years since America invaded Iraq. Nothing good has come out of it. The only results have been: dead children, civil war, and richer businessmen.

Posted by amin at 8:24 PM | Comments (0)

March 19, 2006

Came back from Amherst. It’s our spring break and as usual I’m not doing anything special. But I have to admit that it’s good to have a week off from school even though I know it’s going to be boring. I’m tired and need to relax.

Went to IHOP with Shaz, Shahriar, and Ali. I hadn’t gone there for so long. It was very crowded. Crowded places make me anxious; especially restaurants. You can’t talk to people, can’t hear them, and you feel pressured to finish your food as fast as possible because people are waiting in line and you don’t want them to think that you are an asshole who is sitting there carelessly.

Talked to Tehran today. It was a long time since I had talked to my mom. She sounded terribly excited. I think the only people who are truly in love are mothers. They are devoted to their children, and their love is endless, selfless, and unconditional. At least that’s how my mom is. I remember once when I was really young I asked her who are the people that she hates. She told me that she doesn’t hate anyone. I replied that’s impossible because there are a lot of people in my kindergarten who I hate. “Don’t hate anyone. Never” she said. And I haven’t. The sound of her voice is still in my head. I can still see the tears in her eyes and feel the lump in her throat when she said that. It was as though something was revealed to me. It was a “moment”, and I’m sure it will always be with me. You can NEVER forget “moments”. They only happen a few times in your lifetime.

Posted by amin at 12:21 AM | Comments (0)